The struggle with the Shadow Self
Sunday, April 27th, 2008
One of the battles that each person must face in this life, in my opinion, is the struggle with the shadow self. In my philosophy, the shadow self has a particular meaning, which is somewhat different from the usual way the term is understood, with reference to Jungian Philosophy. In that corpus, the shadow is regarded as those aspects of the self that are regarded as shameful, frightening, dangerous or otherwise anti-social. It is those aspects of the self which have been repressed and relegated to the unconscious. Unless the Jungian shadow is faced, it is destined to control one through secret impulses and subconscious urges. Well that is cutting a long story short. In my philosophy, I refer to something else as the shadow self. It has got to do with the difference between the true self, and the self we construct for social consumption.
Each of us constructs a persona as we go through childhood and adolescence, based partly on reaction to our parents and significant adults, and partly on our desire to please our parents, our peers, and significant others. Along with this persona, we construct a personal story of who we are, and what we are about in this life. Many simply adopt the story given to them by family and religion. Others work hard to come up with their own story. It is of no consequence, because all such stories are based on the rational self identity. This is the aspect of mind which distinguishes between self and other. And so our personal story of self becomes a way of demarcating ourselves from the rest of humanity.
As we build up this story, we take on the dreams and aspirations of others that we admire, or perhaps those with whom we are competitive – such as brothers, sisters, or close childhood friends. It may be the dreams and goals of a parent, for example, or the desire to do better than an older brother or sister, or the desire to please someone we really like. However it happens, by the time one arrives on the cusp of adulthood, most people have constructed for themselves a set of dreams and goals entwined with their idea of who they are, based on their experiences, and their reactions to the people around them.
The pursuit of these dreams and goals very rarely brings anything but grief and frustration, unless one is able to go beyond the rational self-construct, and discover the dreams and goals of the true self.
I believe that the true self, the spiritual identity that manifests as the human being that you are, always has a goal and purpose, a destiny, if you will. However this purpose and destiny is not something that the rational mind automatically knows and accepts. In fact, it may often be something that the rational self rejects and struggles against. However, I believe that the knowledge of this soul purpose and destiny is the key to fulfilment and happiness in this life.
So where does the shadow self come into things? Well the way I see things, the life that most people live can be viewed as the life of the shadow self – the self constructed from the rational mind and being, based on one’s upbringing and experiences. The shadow self is locked in mortal combat with the true self, and the victor will have the opportunity of pursuing its dreams within the theartre of life. It is a mortal combat because one or the other must prevail. Either the shadow self wins, and one devotes one’s life to fulfilling the shadow’s dreams, or the true self prevails, and one devotes oneself to one’s soul purpose and destiny. When the shadow self wins, the fulfilment of one’s so-called dreams brings neither fulfilment, nor satisfaction. However when the true self wins the struggle to take precedence, a sense of fulfilment comes merely from the pursuit of one’s soul purpose – even if the achievement may be many years in the future, or may never come to pass. It makes no difference, as there is great fulfilment and satisfaction in just recognising the soul self, and allowing it (you) to pursue its purpose.
The shadow self and the soul self, at some stage of a spiritual life, become locked in a fierce struggle to the death. Neither wants to give in. However, happiness and fulfillment and the greater good is served by the victory of the true self. So do not fear to put the shadow self, with all its false dreams absorbed from others, to death. It is the only way that the true self may follow and realise its destiny. It is, however, an act which few, in the modern world, have the courage or wit to attempt. Those who do so find themselves truly alive – ready and willing to serve – the Ancient Ones, the Greater Organism of Life, and their own soul nature.
You can read more about the shadow self in my book “The Great Work”.
Blessed Be,
Rob